How Long

How long does it take for the large pot of water to boil, and how long does it take my heart to release the memory of joy known a day ago?  The pot of water heats on the stove so that I may rinse the dishes I just washed.  Thanksgiving happened yesterday.  I went to bed late with the understanding I would wake up to a sink full of dishes.  I went to bed with the hope I might again dream, and somehow get past my memory of the joy I experienced a night ago, so that I might stay present.

The sun shines brightly today, and I could be doing laundry.  However, I instead wrestle with the desire to prolong my joy.  Is it not normal to wish to hang on to a feeling I have not known in such a long time?  Yet, I know that with time this memory of yesterday or the day before will fade.  The moments passed, and today is a new day, with new opportunities to be open to the unknown.  My only assurance is that I, in fact, know myself, and know my blessings.  The spirit-driven singer musician plays his/her instrument daily to stay in touch with the intangible source of inspiration.  I need to write daily to stay in touch with my innermost self.  This does not come through a conversation with a friend, or the embrace of a lover.  These happenings simply augment my perception of Truth.  Today I see the beauty in my surroundings, and feel the ongoing surge of energy.  This is All That Is.  To cling to a memory of yesterday gets in the way of being here today, this I know.  I lived too many years hanging on to things past.  I will never know what I missed in all those years of struggle, sorrow, and pain as I stayed with the past, drowning slowly, as though I were being pulled down into quicksand, unable to save myself except by surrendering.  I learned to surrender.  I died, repeatedly, and found I never needed to fear.  I am a part of All That Is, with no beginning and no end.  I realize that in those moments I know joy, the energy flowing is ongoing, and I need never fear being booted out of this stream of energy.

Thus, today I welcome the sun, the quiet, my solitude, and trust that all is well. All that is required is staying present.  I may acknowledge and release all the nuances of my heart and mind, certain of the blessings that make up this lifetime.  My heart is full of gratitude.  I have water with which to stay clean, a home in which to mosey about, food in the fridge, and the awareness that no matter what, I need not worry about time, or how long it takes for anything to pass, or to come into being.  Life unfolds, moment to moment; the pot of water heats on the stove, and my heart beats effortlessly.  The fact that I encountered joy with another recently only serves to remind me that I live in love.  We all live in love.  Reality is beyond time, and thus, I may let go the need to know how long anything will last.  I am here today, free to question, and free to surrender.  The question of how long is answered in being here, boiling the water and listening to my heart.

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